Balance. What is it? Why do so many people talk about living a balanced life?
Is it possible to have work/life balance?
Finding balance through each season of motherhood sounds like a dream.
So many moms you see out and about seem like they have it all together.
They are seen volunteering, picking their kids up and dropping them off at school every day, cooking meals each night for dinner, taking their kids to activities…
It feels like the list goes on and on, right?
You’ve seen it. You’ve felt it.
So have I.
But what we aren’t seeing is their life behind closed doors. You can’t possibly judge someone based on what you see right in front of you.
The Problem With Judging Someone Else’s Balanced Life
We see others and think they must be doing something right… they have a secret you don’t have because they seem to have it all together.
There are issues with this thought.
Getting caught up in the act of comparison is all too easy.
Comparison to others is a dangerous road to take.
When you start to compare yourself to others it’s limiting your mindset and your own worth.
Just because you see someone doing something you think is better than you don’t compare yourself.
All you can see is what is going on in that moment. That perfect photo. Not what is going on in the rest of their life.
“Comparison is the thief of joy.” — Theodore Roosevelt
Measuring your life against Pinterest
This is something I see others talking about a lot. I’ve been there.
I use Pinterest daily for my business and weekly for my personal life.
I go on to find recipes, activities, inspiration for gardening and household projects.
Seeing others making these seemingly perfect Pinterest projects shouldn’t be your measuring stick for life or your worthiness.
You cannot do it all. You certainly cannot do it all and do it well.
You’ve been there. I’ve been there. It’s a troublesome place to be because guilt can creep in at the most inopportune times.
One minute you’re feeling joy and the next you’re feeling guilt. Don’t allow that feeling to be your guide on whether or not you are living a balanced life.
Seasons of Motherhood
So how do you go about finding balance in your life through each season of motherhood?
Well, first we need to determine what those seasons are.
- Bringing a new baby home
- Starting a new relationship
- Beginning a new job
- Transitioning into becoming a stay at home mom
- Struggling financially
- Moving to a new state
- Children going back to school
- Children not listening
- A child potty training
These are just a few seasons of motherhood that you may be facing.
First figuring out what season you’re in will help you to create balance no matter which one you’re in.
There is an obvious way to create more balance in your life that others talk about a lot.
- Settings goals
- Determining your priorities
- Planning ahead
While these are obvious to many I feel like there is a much deeper way to create balance.
When I’m talking to mamas and they are asking about creating a balanced life I like to talk about values, gratitude, being present and planning/preparation.
Finding your family values is crucial. If you haven’t done this before it’s about high time to start.
When you figure out what is important to you and everyone else in your family it’s a lot easier to determine your priorities and say yes or no.
Practicing gratitude is something I feel like we all should do to mitigate the comparison or feeling of unworthiness or imbalance.
When you practice gratitude you lead with positive instead of negative.
When you have moments of family time, volunteering, etc. then be present for those. Don’t be thinking about the mile long to do list you need to complete.
Prepare ahead of time based on your season of life.
Depending on what season of motherhood you’re in you will want to do some planning and prepping ahead of time.
Getting ahead of meals, stocking up on sheets or ppull-ups There is a lot you can do to prepare ahead of time depending on what season of motherhood you’re in.
Stop seeking approval from others
I know this is easier said than done but you have to stop this right now.
One thing you can do today is to stop checking your phone first thing in the morning.
When you start your day reacting to the others then you start your day you aren’t acting on your own free will.
You aren’t thinking the things you want to think or feel the things you want to feel because you’re reacting to what others are doing and saying.
This can put you in a place of comparison and feel imbalanced.
Just remember mama. There are no secrets to creating balance in your life. You have to figure out what is important to you and go from there.